1. They can detect the difference between the scent of cleanliness and that of filth masked by Febreze within seconds, so don’t try to fool them with a few quick squirts of some over-the-counter air freshener.
2. You’ll probably receive more than one over-priced scented candle as a gift for no special occasion.
3. They’d rather stab their eyes with sharp pins than hook up with someone who lets grime accumulate beneath the tips of their fingernails. In their view, owning a proper manicure kit is absolutely necessary for both men and women
4. Showering regularly is non-negotiable.
5. Those old sweats you just love to lounge around in might be kind of cute and borderline tolerable, but they definitely won’t get you laid later.
6. They will happily volunteer to load the dishwasher or wash the dishes after every meal—not because they’re feeling generous, but because the sight of a pile of…
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